I already took care of the “Mormon” thing.

Mitt Romney might not remember it, but I previously solved his problem (if that’s what it is) of being a Mormon and running for President.

While a certain slice of evangelical Protestantism may focus on obtuse matters of theology and whether Mitt’s faith qualifies as Christian, most folks have a much different concern about the Mormon thing.

But there’s nothing to worry about.

I met with Romney for a column interview when he was still governor, and I focused directly on the potentially crippling concern about Romney being a Mormon. Wouldn’t White House cocktail parties be rather boring, if there were no, you know, cocktails?

Romney assured me that his religious/family traditions of not drinking would not influence the beer drinking at Rose Garden barbeques, or the wine and whiskey drinking at state dinners.

There. One obstacle overcome.

This is how Romney has to handle every concern about him being president. Direct. Brief. Reassuring.

Even the flip-flop thing, which the Boston Globe and its columnists bring up about every 14 seconds – and Mitt’s GOP competitors use to modest advantage.

Be honest, Mitt. Only mentally ill people don’t flip-flop; that’s how life is. Public policy and politics is complex and ever-changing and, within reason, it’s alright to finesse a bit of a change in opinion and perspective.

There. Another obstacle overcome.

And what about Mitt, the amoral, bloodless businessman/Bain consultant monster, who roamed the Earth taking over companies and laying off people? Mitt, your response seemed tentative and a bit defensive. Say it. Say it out loud. ‘Oh, grow up, you big babies.”

That’s right. Whether on a micro or a macro scale, tough decisions need to be made, unless you want the entire nation to look like Central Falls, R.I.

The Fix Is In

Speaking of Central Falls, the bankrupt little city that seemed to face the threat of financial calamity with an inevitability that was a bit spooky, Mitt should talk about Central Falls – and tie it in to his unfriendly takeover of Springfield.

Ah, Springfield. One of those factory towns without many factories, pretending to be a cosmopolitan oasis whose checks would never bounce.

It could well have gone bankrupt, just like Central Falls – and the mess would have been much more significant. But, Romney, while governor, sent in a SWAT-team of accountants with one eye in the middle of their foreheads who screamed at the unions and sort of took over and fixed the place.

Mitt is good at that. He fixed the Salt Lake Olympics. He fixed Springfield. Mitt should walk around county fairs wearing a tool belt and a sign: “I fix stuff.”

There. Another obstacle overcome.

And then, of course, there is RomneyCare, the Massachusetts health-insurance-for-everyone-unless-you-want-a-traffic-ticket-for-not-cooperating thing that is not quite as grandiose as ObamaCare.

This is the tricky one for Romney, because it represents a toxic mix of politics and policy and “smaller government” theology that isn’t easy to navigate.

The politics should be the easy part. Again, Mitt just has to hold his nose and tell the truth:

“For goodness sakes, I was governor of Massachusetts, not New Hampshire. Governing in a tax-and-spend environment, I came up with something rational and business-like, which, despite its cost and intrusiveness, sucked in enough healthy, affluent people so that the newly insured poor people didn’t put us completely over the edge.”

Voters would get that. They know that Massachusetts is some sort of foreign country and that all the Libertarian-types get exiled to New Hampshire.

Mitt needs to tone down the “I’ll dismantle ObamaCare” thing. Again, he needs to harken back to Springfield. Things can and often must be fixed in increments. Mitt can promise to “fix” health care, but in manageable bite sizes that don’t allow the bureaucrats to overwhelm individual choices, markets and common sense.

There. All better now. Mitt just needed a consultant. He knows how that works.